When you’re a woman who loves girls, but prefers boys, why does society have such an issue with this?
As the mother of one child, a son, and the grandmother of all boys, people are constantly telling me I need a girl child in my life. I love girls, but have never had a desire for one of my own. I know I’m not alone, either.
Minding Other People’s Business
Months ago, this conversation came up on social media after a woman with 3 boys posted a photo and someone else mentioned she needed a girl. When this mom said that she didn’t want a girl and was, in fact, happy with all boys, her comments exploded with women telling her she needed to re-think her entire life. Okay, I’m exaggerating, but there were a lot of women who seemed confused as to why a woman wouldn’t want a daughter and some seemed downright offended when she stood her ground.
Me and Mine
When I was pregnant with my son, of course I wanted a healthy baby, but I literally prayed to God for 9 straight months that I’d have a boy. When my daughter-in-law was pregnant with my first grand, I repeated that same prayer and got my OG (original grandson, lol). Next pregnancy, I prayed again for my second grandson.
Daughter-in-love is on her 3rd pregnancy now and every single person we told in the beginning, wished a little girl upon us. Again, all we want is healthy children and will love every single one to the max, but when we found out she was pregnant with twins, people swore at least one would be a girl because, according to them, we deserved it and it was time.
The twins are boys, however, and you can’t even imagine the puzzled looks I get when I tell people who are disappointed we aren’t having a girl, that I’m elated about twin boys because all I’ve ever wanted is boys, boys, boys!!! Nothing personal against girls… I adore my god-daughters, my little girl cousins and all of my friend’s daughters, but I don’t long to have a little girl of my own. Daughter-in-love leans towards boys, too, although she would’ve been happy with a baby girl had she been blessed with one. She’s never, though, really “wanted” a girl, specifically.
Let Me Count the Ways
Why do I love boys, so? Well, let me start by saying I know girls can have all of the same qualities I’m about to share, but I love that boys:
- Take 2 seconds to dress in the morning
- Require very little hair maintenance
- Wrestle and rough-house nonstop
- Are just as handsome with dirty faces and skinned knees as they are in their Sunday best
- Naturally fancy themselves as protectors (Oh, the funny stories I can tell about my son when he was a wee lil fella who would hulk up about his mama, lol)
- Are “over” drama in about 2.5 seconds and friends again in under :30
- They grow into men who are strong leaders (yes, I know girls can also be bosses. I’m just saying I like strong male leaders and if you raise boys right, well…)
Feminists, Stand Down
Now, I don’t label myself a feminist, but I have very strong ideas about womanhood, equality and the powers inherent in women. We are fully deserving of equality, safety and freedom at every level. I also know that what I’ve just shared sounds extremely biased. However, being pro-boy doesn’t mean I’m anti-girl. But given a choice, aren’t I entitled to favor one over the other without people being offended or telling me I’m wrong?
What’s Your Story?
Are you a mother or a grandmother? Do you have girls or boys or both? I’ve heard a lot of women who have both also say that they love their children the same, but that they slightly prefer “boy energy” over that of their daughters and granddaughters. I don’t see anything at all wrong with that, do you?
Tell me what you think in the comments or find me on social media @lalalivesonline and let’s continue the discussion there.
